What a fun filled week it’s been so far!!! Sunday night Tim and I got to double date with my parents to the Danny Gokey concert and how amazing that was!!
He really knows how to get the crowd going and he can really perform all while glorifying God! I laughed and I cried and I praised God for all of the amazing blessings my life is filled with…and not things…but the amazng people in our lives!
I took my book because I thought you know what, so many amazing songs have come across the radio at the most appropriate times for me. “There’s Hope In Front of Me” was one of those songs so I thought it might be cool to let one of these artists see just what kind of struggles one of their listeners deals with. That one song specifically, can instantly calm me and reminds me that no matter what I am facing…the struggles that continue to rise, the selfish days I question if it’s all worth it…of course it’s worth it!! Because there is hope and good days just around the corner!!
Things won’t always be bad, life is full of ups and downs…and usually the downs tend to crash upon us all at once but I have faith things will get better! I have hope that my good days will outweigh my bad days! And if that song wasn’t powerful enough, his most recent song really hit home!! “Tell Your Heart To Beat Again”…and the best verse in the song that overtakes me and brings me to tears every stinking time…
What an eye opening reminder that while we might think our lives are crumbling and falling apart…God is still working in us! While I might be crying now, I know God is encouraging me to just hold on, to let go of my own control and what I think is best…and to trust Him because He is guiding me!!
So anyway, even though I had intentions of handing out my book, I of course chickened out! Tim and mom pushed me to give my book to him and well, I’m not the assertive type so my mom saw the sound guy and went to ask if he worked with Danny which he did. I was set to just have my mom give my book to him…to give to Danny! Haha! But no, he informed my mom that Danny would be coming out to sign autographs so I could give my book to him personally! Noooo! Tim and my mom pressured me, saying really I had nothing to lose and I would not get this opportunity again! As Tim and I waited in line…
I constantly bombarded Tim with what do I say? Should I do this or say that? How should I open the coversation? I was also in my fleeing mode and begged Tim to let me just leave the book on the stage and if he gets it he gets it but Tim said no! Haha!
Finally, it was our turn and really I have no idea what I all said but he did seem appreciative that I gave him the book! And he high fived me and grabbed my hand when I said I had outlived my diagnosis by 4 years;)
I’m not sure what we’re doing here haha!!
It was another night where I stepped out of my comfort zone and regardless if he reads it or not (which I really hope he does take the time to), God has defintely used the illness I originally thought was destroying my life…for me to grow in my faith, my confidence…and my fears of public speaking and initiating contacts with people! Haha! Because of my illness, I found my way again!!
Then Monday I had a follow up appointment on a few different issues, go figure, but all seems to be okay and no referrals made to any other specialists! Wahoo!!
Tuesday night Nathan had his last orchestra concert as a 6th grader and he did great!!
And tonight was the first night of dance rehearsal for Leah’s big recital coming up!
And as I am getting all emotional from looking at how old she is in these pictures…I again became overwhelmed with how far God has brought me! Seeing the smiles on our kids faces encourages me because so often I feel like being sick prevents me from being the mom they so desperately deserve.
I am so thankful that God continues to watch over us…well He always has but now I actually see that He always has been here with us!
Unfortunatelty I haven’t always made God priority. And while I am still sick, actually worse off than I was before, I am happier than I was before! I truly see the little beautiful things that I was missing out on. My circumstances haven’t changed, well, actually they’ve gotten worse, and the last couple of weeks, everything has actually started to pile up and may be the beginning of new challenges! But I am happy, Tim is happy because we are relying on God to pull us through…and we know He will!
There is no perfect life, and Tim and I tried for so long to control everything ourselves, which almost destroyed us! Today we were faced with some challenges and Tim handled it the best he ever has! He simply replied “Surprisngly, I am okay with whatever happens, and I know God will take care of us”!
Yes, I cried after I got off the phone with him! But, after he said that about one situation…we were faced with three more situations and Tim said he better rethink what he had told me earlier! Haha! No matter what we are faced with we will get through it together, because we both have God as our main priority!!
The rest of the week is filled with some minor doctor appointments for me and a lot of dance rehearsals on top of working and trying to catch up! So, now while I would loveeee to go to bed, I am off to do some work while the kids are sleeping!
And in case you haven’t heard this song yet…here you go!